Death as we know forms a significant part within the cycle of life. One certainty that we are sure of when we are born is that we will die. How we will die is a mystery but we will die all the same. Yet Death is a topic we rarely speak about in fear of being called morbid, appearing strange, mentally impaired/challenged/ Sadistic this list goes on. Due to this many of us fail to have end of life plans in place leaving our surviving families to add financial strain and stress to the madness of grief.
Some that do choose not to share the contents with loved ones. As we seek to adapt life styles to preserve life we forget life is just leased to us. By silencing the word indirectly leaves us believing it cannot happen to me, I am healthy, I am simply too young or I am God fearing he will move this cup from me as I am blessed and highly favoured.
Then death stirs life’s pot and someone has a miscarriage shattering all those unspoken plans, A child is still born, returning grieved parents to an empty well decorated nursery, not filled with the gentle sobs of baby but their painful wails. Starting my tale, our teenager leaves the house “Bye mum I love you” never to be seen alive again, A fatal car accident, diagnosis of a life threatening or terminal illness, kidnap…..murder. No matter what we do, or what we believe, death is real, death is natural and death my friend is a daily occurrence.
When tragedy arises we find ourselves immediately catapulted in the silent, isolating and cold world of death, where words are hard to find to explain the grief, sorrow and mourning about to commence. A world where the dictionary has no words to explain nothingness, the heaviness of loss which gives birth to a crippling ache and loss deep enough to describe the abyss of pain. A world where the living survivors are supposed to live and find purpose, while answering an endless sea of why’s, wearing a survivors mask, when all you want to do is die as death washes the vail from your eyes as you realise, those that should be there are not, those that want to be there, due to their personal pain, cannot, those you least expect to be there, will be, yet you will still be isolated and broken as no one will grieve your loved one as you will, as you grieve the individual life’s experiences you each shared together and who that person meant to you.
The truth is the hardest thing. Accepting that you loved one has gone. Admitting to the part they themselves played or did not play in the tragic event. Where they caught up in the new street culture, was It drug related, did they have a long term illness, Cancer, Alzheimer’s, or were they simply an innocent participator, not destined to remain long in the circle of life. Whatever the reason, death came knocking and placed his palm into theirs and took them to start the next chapter of their journey, without warning and consent from the family. Remaining silent about this subject left me ill planned when death knocked at my door and stole my son, destroyed my family and brok my tender heart. I was unsure as to what to do, what to expect, how to act, what to say, what not to say, who to turn to and more importantly how on earth I was expected to stand as a corpse with four other children looking to me guidance.
The paperback edition of my book “Kyron: Hello Madness Goodbye Joy” is live in the Amazon Store. It is available for you to purchase via this link https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1728855977/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1540203435&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=hello+madness&dpPl=1&dpID=41k45GKLllL&ref=plSrch