Parents are to blame

Guest blogger Rachel Rose MSc

Dear son,

I tried really i did
I did for you what most mums won’t do for their kid
I fought for you every step of the way
To not let them label you and throw your life away.
But my biggest fight wasnt with them
My fight was with you my boy, who once held onto my hem
You battled with anger and emotions daily,
I tried to steer you away from a life of failing.
But you fought me over and over,
And the more i tried to hold on, you just distanced yourself further.
Your disobedience hurt me more than you could know,
But the pull of your friends just continued to grow

Your brothers felt the brunt of my hurt and pain
And even tried to talk to you, but this was in vain.
They grew tired of broken walls and furniture,
As well as the constant shouting as they matured
The impact was devastating that’s a fact
And our family, as a result did crack.

Constant calls from school meant frequent disruptions at work
Having to explain to them that my child always came first
But that meant sacrifices in my career and
Promotion was a not a prospect for me my dear,
Because commitment was something i could not adhere.

I failed you in the other parent i chose for you,
He is immature, and doesnt know what good dads do
I tried to get him to be a good dad i really did,
But he was too busy doing road too and said money not time and love was what you needed.

I didn’t know how to ask for help at first
Because a bad mother I’d be labelled and cursed
But when i opened up, everyone and their mum was too busy or had a barrage of solutions
I tried the solutions, but those people didn’t live with your turbulent emotions.
And werent there after night after night to deal with the commotion.

People with children without behavioural issues can easily pass judgement,
But children like you with a chemical brain imbalance dont always understand punishment.
They think i’m a bad parent, and haven’t done enough
But to live it everyday they dont know, trust me it’s tough.

Endless nights i’d sit and worry
That you may not come home and one day, you my son, i would have to bury.
But you didn’t care because you had no fear
And only kept going and upping the gears.

Discipline was never a factor, i set boundaries and timelines that you just wouldn’t follow
Now when i talk to you the words just appear hollow.
I don’t know the answers in how to fix this
But my baby boy, with your cute smile i truly miss.
You’ve chosen a lifestyle so totally opposite,
That to reach you now its going to take something drastic.

I hope you don’t regret not abiding by my rules
Because you thought i didnt understand and thought i was a fool.
But you see son, I’ve lived life and know what road can do
And tried to teach you all that I knew

But you think you know better, and think im too strict
Because my 7pm curfew on a weekend takes the mick.
I wanted you to experience childhood
And thought I’d instilled enough in you to not get caught up in the hood.

But baby boy you’ve run straight into it
And when its done, all it will do is chew you up and spit.
Don’t let what you think is glitz and glamour
Ruin your life by either death or the judges hammer.

Know that there’s more to life than the road.
I’ve always taught you to stand up and follow your own code
Be brave and walk away and stand proud
Don’t become a statistic or just part of the crowd.
You deserve to see what a fruitful life truly holds
And not one driven by greed on the roads.

In closing. For the parents who live this daily dont be afraid to ask for help or fear what people will say. For those parents who dont live this.. be mindful in how you offer support and pass judgement.

The ebook and paperback edition of “Kyron: Hello Madness, Goodbye joy. The memoir of Rachel Webb’s son Kyron Webb who was murdered in Manchester October 17th 2017 is now available to purchase in the Amazon store. Please use link.

6 thoughts on “Parents are to blame”

  1. Wow. How heartfelt and powerful. Thank you so much guest blogger for sharing with us. We outsiders looking in need to stop being so quick to just ‘blame the parents. As we see here many of them really do all they can and more to avoid them going down the wrong path. When they get strength and to the age of reasoning, the truth is whether we like it or not the onus is on them. There is a proverb that says ‘train up the child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. I’m sure many mothers have experience of their children straying from the path, some for a long time but what you have instilled in them is stronger than you know, haunts them and pricks their heart even whilst on the road. It can’t be uprooted. He will get back on the right path. Never give up hope your sons. God bless you. Xx


  2. A heart breaking commentary on the effects of a broken society, broken by intolerance, broken by prejudice, broken by lack of one’s identity, broken by poverty, broken by Corporate greed, broken by a a fase austerity created by a broken government in a country heading for the precipice and it’s own break up!
    R.I.P., U.K!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. When we as parents have our children and we talk to them .it very wear it work .and the reason for that is they listen to their friend. Friend say me a go street you a come blood. Friend say I am going home .friend will start saying u a boy and treting because of all that it will make the boy start to brock out to the street. Know they become blood brother’s.parents sit cry don’t know where to turn and who to turn to know you become bad parents .it is facts that you cannot talk to any and anyone when it come to your kids .they pretended and as you turn your back they chat you. Things should be like back in the days where we could take to any kids you see in the road are take then home to their parents

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Very heartbreaking for the parents who discipline their children and still end up with a child or children going down the wrong path. Peer pressure, materialism and social media are just a few factors causing the problems amongst our youths, until the root causes are addressed then the problems will continue.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. You did not fail your son. You were an amazing mum and still are. You involved your children in everything you did and more, even running to their side when they needed you. You have wise instruction, even helping me with my issues and loving children so much that each xhild, even mine became yours. You have been hard done by but don’t let that destroy you and what you stand for. I for one would like to read your book and if it is not out of order, would you please sign it for me as one struggling, sometimes, mum to another.
    Don’t give up as the fight goes on daily foe our young people and we need you to stand in the gap for us as we stand in the gap for you.
    May God keep you, strengthen you and give you peace of mind. IJN AMEN

    Liked by 2 people

    1. This is a guest post written by a mother currently going through challenges. As oppose to being supported she is being judged. I am happy to sign a book for you when you are ready. Thank you for your feedback


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